Not too long ago, SEGA ported the 2013 Sonic Lost World from the Wii-U to the PC. I knew it would suck. I bought it. See, Sonic fans have Stockholm Syndrome with this series. I know people who have stuck with it every terrible installment along the way and the funny thing is I'm not even one of them! I grew up on only one Sonic game, I haven't played most of the modern Sonic games and those I have played were the handheld versions (i.e. the good ones).
I guess Sonic does represent pure nostalgia, not so much for the license itself, but rather nostalgia for an era when platformers were king (or, in fact, an existing genre), when levels were colorful and when talking animals were the player's company when they pressed along just to see what the next "Zone" would look like. In all fairness, a lot of that still exists in the series; talking animals, varied levels and zones, a lot of colors and cheery music. It's the platforming part that sucks.
I was being facetious earlier; I didn't jump at the opportunity to buy Lost World. I got it on a sale and before I did, I read through the Steam Store reviews to have a good picture of what I was getting, if anything at all. After all, Sonic Generations was a good enough game and since Sonic Colors, the die-hard fans have seemed to not hate each new installment in the series. When I hit the Checkout button, I knew what I was getting myself into.
It's just that, I was hoping that, after over fifteen years of "Modern Sonic" (which is to say, 3D platformer, wise-cracking dipshit Sonic), things should be getting progressively better. There are good things to say about the game; the port is good (upscaled at 1080p at a steady 60fps), the visuals are colorful, the levels are diverse and look interesting and though the story is absolute trash, it's a bareable kind of trash. The music is pretty catchy too, even if forgettable right after one quits the game. Unfortunately, this is a game. Gameplay matters.
Listen, Sonic Team, 3D Sonic isn't happening. Stop trying to make it happen. Even what's arguably your best Sonic game since the Dreamcast titles, Sonic Generations, worked because of Classic Sonic (for the uninitiated, Generations was the anniversary game that teamed up Classic Sonic from the 16-bit era with his modern counterpart). Now now, you've been getting better. I do have to give you credit; after over a decade of faffing about with 3D Sonic and spectacularly failing, you've improved. Lost World has decent controls. Gameplay is broken up by precision platforming, which was mostly absent from previous 3D Sonic titles. Most importantly, you finally realized that a dedicated "running" button is necessary for a character that relies on speed, but has to hit the breaks at a fragment of a second's notice.
I'm not even kidding; the dedicated RUN button was genius! It feels weird at first, considering Sonic has always been about speed, but mechanically it works wonders. Actually, I'll go on record saying that for a good chunk of the game, it seemed like you finally figured it out.
Then, you had a massive stroke. I presume you all had a stroke, at least. Half-way through the campaign, everything that has always been terrible about Sonic made its return in full force. Cheap deaths? Check. Narrow platforms that are nearly impossible to navigate? Check. Confusing levels that make the player nauseous? Check. The game playing itself on auto-pilot? Check. Modern, dynamic physics in archaic level design, which rob players from the control of the player-character and relegate gameplay to the cosmic synergy brought about by the occasional alignment of the stars? Super-ultra-check. Insta-kills out of left field without the slightest warning? Motherfucking check!
It's fairly obvious at this point that when the same problems persist fifteen years later, the entire formula is just wrong. There have always been several reasons to which the failure of 3D Sonic could be attributed, but it's clear that in Lost World you've ironed out most of the problems with controls and precision platforming; in other words, you've ironed out the primary problems that had been haunting the series since Sonic Adventure on the Dreamcast. Your problems now come from level and gameplay design. The mechanics are finally solid, but the surrounding environment doesn't complement them.
It occurs to me that the one thing that nobody ever realized about 3D Sonic is that it doesn't work, because it's not supposed to work. Platformers are scarce nowadays (outside the indie scene), but they enjoyed moderate success even during the Playstation and PS2 eras. So, why did 3D platforming work for Mario, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro the Dragon and Ratchet & Clank? Well, it was probably because the levels were made to be navigated. Going through objectives was linear, but each level was fairly open. Each objective was designed based on said level. Losing a platform and getting sidetracked didn't mean instant death (not always, at least). The player could slow down, choose their own pacing, mess around with the controls. I remember spending a considerable amount of time trying to fly from pillar to pillar with Spyro in his first game and going around the levels, talking to other dragons, looking for collectibles.
Sonic, on the other hand, is designed to work in a corridor. Since the first game, Sonic levels have been long corridors with hoops and springs for stunts. They are supposed to be linear and able to be traversed at high velocities. Even to this day, Sonic games are basic "go from A to B until you hear the finishing jingle". Add to that the speed and tricks and you have a mess in three dimensions.
Sonic the Hedgehog is a racing game. It's also a platformer. These two don't mix well. This series, for the last fifteen years, has been stuck between modern gaming principles and the restrictions of classic design conventions.
So the solution is this: take Classic Sonic, from Sonic Generations and make that. Again. And Again. And again!
Oh, but you may ask; if that's the case, how come Sonic 4 sucked to the point of being essentially cancelled? This is an entire other topic on its own and a good deal of the failure comes from the fact that both Sonic 4 "Episodes" were roughly recreations of Sonic and Sonic 2 on the Mega Drive. Mainly, however, the problem was that this wasn't classic Sonic. It was modern Sonic on a 2D plane. The game looked bad, Sonic controlled like shit, it was unresponsive, it was slow and most importantly, it was boring.
Just because Sonic 4 was bad, it doesn't mean the formula itself is bad. Lost World tends to shift from 3D to 2D and it's not the first Modern Sonic game to do so. Actually, here's the thing: if you're afraid that Sonic 4 was proof people don't want 2D Sonic, look back at Sonic Generations. That game also switched Modern Sonic to 2D from time to time. Classic Sonic 2D and Modern Sonic 2D played different and felt different (with Classic being undoubtedly more responsive and enjoyable), in the same, damned, game! This isn't comparing apples to oranges, different developers, different games; it was two similar things, in the same game. One was better than the other. This points not to a question of talent or ideas or skill, but of style and approach to design.
All joking aside, if I didn't like Sonic, I wouldn't buy the damned game. I was very much aware of the series' issues. I'm in the minority that really doesn't like Sonic Adventure. I even had my fair share of problems with Sonic Generations, which I generally enjoyed. I knew what I was getting myself into. I also know that Sonic Team isn't so much bereft of talent and ideas; they're mostly stuck in a baffled state of wondering how they'll make Sonic a hit again.
You won't. You can't. Platformers aren't ever going to sell like hotcakes again. The reason why gaming is a multi-billion dollar industry is because it has expanded its audience beyond children. Adults do enjoy platformers, but the numbers just don't stack up. The casual adult market isn't going to play platformers. Mario still sells, because the license is just too big and has a better track record. It's also a lot more versatile. You've attempted to move Sonic to different genres before, but the framework is a "nature VS technology" theme that you consistently burden with a cast of dumb fucking animal friends, who are merely grating to the ear at the best of times. "Nature VS Technology" itself is a vehicle for "Childhood innocence and energy VS dreary, over-efficient adulthood" and even that you butcher with the most annoying interpretation of caffeinated 3-year-olds with easy access to the weapon cabinet.
But I don't particularly care for these. If you want to make Sonic a household name again and make the license more diverse, work on the fucking plot. Personally, I care about the classic platforming gameplay. Stop sitting dumbfounded, hoping the next tiny bit of a new idea or innovation you'll force-feed the franchise gels with critics just well enough to spare you an average of 3 on Metacritic. Stop fantasizing that one day, some undefined deity is going to reach down from its cloud and make Sonic bigger than Mario, just because you added color powers in the latest installment (again). It's not happening.
Instead focus on going back to what works. Platforming in 2D corridors. Responsive controls. Design that allows for both speed and precision platforming (the biggest strength, in my opinion, of the Mega Drive titles). Hold on to tried formulas. Drop the outdated systems, like the obsolete lives system. Gamers, like every single living conscious thing on this planet, operate better on reward rather than punishment.
Look at the indies. They're choke-full of 2D platformers. They work. They are focused, they are polished, they are budget. You have some of the most refined 2D platforming in the history of gaming in your hands and you just waste it.
Let it go, Sonic Team! Let it go, SEGA! Sonic is never going to be the money-printing license that Mario is. But it can be a genuinely popular license with quality products. Kill 3D Sonic. Fifteen years later, that blue furry fuck just isn't worth the green you spend on him. Go retro or go away!
Unless you're comfortable with redefining the entire franchise. But that's a discussion for another time.
I guess Sonic does represent pure nostalgia, not so much for the license itself, but rather nostalgia for an era when platformers were king (or, in fact, an existing genre), when levels were colorful and when talking animals were the player's company when they pressed along just to see what the next "Zone" would look like. In all fairness, a lot of that still exists in the series; talking animals, varied levels and zones, a lot of colors and cheery music. It's the platforming part that sucks.
I was being facetious earlier; I didn't jump at the opportunity to buy Lost World. I got it on a sale and before I did, I read through the Steam Store reviews to have a good picture of what I was getting, if anything at all. After all, Sonic Generations was a good enough game and since Sonic Colors, the die-hard fans have seemed to not hate each new installment in the series. When I hit the Checkout button, I knew what I was getting myself into.
It's just that, I was hoping that, after over fifteen years of "Modern Sonic" (which is to say, 3D platformer, wise-cracking dipshit Sonic), things should be getting progressively better. There are good things to say about the game; the port is good (upscaled at 1080p at a steady 60fps), the visuals are colorful, the levels are diverse and look interesting and though the story is absolute trash, it's a bareable kind of trash. The music is pretty catchy too, even if forgettable right after one quits the game. Unfortunately, this is a game. Gameplay matters.
Listen, Sonic Team, 3D Sonic isn't happening. Stop trying to make it happen. Even what's arguably your best Sonic game since the Dreamcast titles, Sonic Generations, worked because of Classic Sonic (for the uninitiated, Generations was the anniversary game that teamed up Classic Sonic from the 16-bit era with his modern counterpart). Now now, you've been getting better. I do have to give you credit; after over a decade of faffing about with 3D Sonic and spectacularly failing, you've improved. Lost World has decent controls. Gameplay is broken up by precision platforming, which was mostly absent from previous 3D Sonic titles. Most importantly, you finally realized that a dedicated "running" button is necessary for a character that relies on speed, but has to hit the breaks at a fragment of a second's notice.
I'm not even kidding; the dedicated RUN button was genius! It feels weird at first, considering Sonic has always been about speed, but mechanically it works wonders. Actually, I'll go on record saying that for a good chunk of the game, it seemed like you finally figured it out.
Then, you had a massive stroke. I presume you all had a stroke, at least. Half-way through the campaign, everything that has always been terrible about Sonic made its return in full force. Cheap deaths? Check. Narrow platforms that are nearly impossible to navigate? Check. Confusing levels that make the player nauseous? Check. The game playing itself on auto-pilot? Check. Modern, dynamic physics in archaic level design, which rob players from the control of the player-character and relegate gameplay to the cosmic synergy brought about by the occasional alignment of the stars? Super-ultra-check. Insta-kills out of left field without the slightest warning? Motherfucking check!
It's fairly obvious at this point that when the same problems persist fifteen years later, the entire formula is just wrong. There have always been several reasons to which the failure of 3D Sonic could be attributed, but it's clear that in Lost World you've ironed out most of the problems with controls and precision platforming; in other words, you've ironed out the primary problems that had been haunting the series since Sonic Adventure on the Dreamcast. Your problems now come from level and gameplay design. The mechanics are finally solid, but the surrounding environment doesn't complement them.
It occurs to me that the one thing that nobody ever realized about 3D Sonic is that it doesn't work, because it's not supposed to work. Platformers are scarce nowadays (outside the indie scene), but they enjoyed moderate success even during the Playstation and PS2 eras. So, why did 3D platforming work for Mario, Crash Bandicoot, Spyro the Dragon and Ratchet & Clank? Well, it was probably because the levels were made to be navigated. Going through objectives was linear, but each level was fairly open. Each objective was designed based on said level. Losing a platform and getting sidetracked didn't mean instant death (not always, at least). The player could slow down, choose their own pacing, mess around with the controls. I remember spending a considerable amount of time trying to fly from pillar to pillar with Spyro in his first game and going around the levels, talking to other dragons, looking for collectibles.
Sonic, on the other hand, is designed to work in a corridor. Since the first game, Sonic levels have been long corridors with hoops and springs for stunts. They are supposed to be linear and able to be traversed at high velocities. Even to this day, Sonic games are basic "go from A to B until you hear the finishing jingle". Add to that the speed and tricks and you have a mess in three dimensions.
Sonic the Hedgehog is a racing game. It's also a platformer. These two don't mix well. This series, for the last fifteen years, has been stuck between modern gaming principles and the restrictions of classic design conventions.
So the solution is this: take Classic Sonic, from Sonic Generations and make that. Again. And Again. And again!
Oh, but you may ask; if that's the case, how come Sonic 4 sucked to the point of being essentially cancelled? This is an entire other topic on its own and a good deal of the failure comes from the fact that both Sonic 4 "Episodes" were roughly recreations of Sonic and Sonic 2 on the Mega Drive. Mainly, however, the problem was that this wasn't classic Sonic. It was modern Sonic on a 2D plane. The game looked bad, Sonic controlled like shit, it was unresponsive, it was slow and most importantly, it was boring.
Just because Sonic 4 was bad, it doesn't mean the formula itself is bad. Lost World tends to shift from 3D to 2D and it's not the first Modern Sonic game to do so. Actually, here's the thing: if you're afraid that Sonic 4 was proof people don't want 2D Sonic, look back at Sonic Generations. That game also switched Modern Sonic to 2D from time to time. Classic Sonic 2D and Modern Sonic 2D played different and felt different (with Classic being undoubtedly more responsive and enjoyable), in the same, damned, game! This isn't comparing apples to oranges, different developers, different games; it was two similar things, in the same game. One was better than the other. This points not to a question of talent or ideas or skill, but of style and approach to design.
All joking aside, if I didn't like Sonic, I wouldn't buy the damned game. I was very much aware of the series' issues. I'm in the minority that really doesn't like Sonic Adventure. I even had my fair share of problems with Sonic Generations, which I generally enjoyed. I knew what I was getting myself into. I also know that Sonic Team isn't so much bereft of talent and ideas; they're mostly stuck in a baffled state of wondering how they'll make Sonic a hit again.
You won't. You can't. Platformers aren't ever going to sell like hotcakes again. The reason why gaming is a multi-billion dollar industry is because it has expanded its audience beyond children. Adults do enjoy platformers, but the numbers just don't stack up. The casual adult market isn't going to play platformers. Mario still sells, because the license is just too big and has a better track record. It's also a lot more versatile. You've attempted to move Sonic to different genres before, but the framework is a "nature VS technology" theme that you consistently burden with a cast of dumb fucking animal friends, who are merely grating to the ear at the best of times. "Nature VS Technology" itself is a vehicle for "Childhood innocence and energy VS dreary, over-efficient adulthood" and even that you butcher with the most annoying interpretation of caffeinated 3-year-olds with easy access to the weapon cabinet.
But I don't particularly care for these. If you want to make Sonic a household name again and make the license more diverse, work on the fucking plot. Personally, I care about the classic platforming gameplay. Stop sitting dumbfounded, hoping the next tiny bit of a new idea or innovation you'll force-feed the franchise gels with critics just well enough to spare you an average of 3 on Metacritic. Stop fantasizing that one day, some undefined deity is going to reach down from its cloud and make Sonic bigger than Mario, just because you added color powers in the latest installment (again). It's not happening.
Instead focus on going back to what works. Platforming in 2D corridors. Responsive controls. Design that allows for both speed and precision platforming (the biggest strength, in my opinion, of the Mega Drive titles). Hold on to tried formulas. Drop the outdated systems, like the obsolete lives system. Gamers, like every single living conscious thing on this planet, operate better on reward rather than punishment.
Look at the indies. They're choke-full of 2D platformers. They work. They are focused, they are polished, they are budget. You have some of the most refined 2D platforming in the history of gaming in your hands and you just waste it.
Let it go, Sonic Team! Let it go, SEGA! Sonic is never going to be the money-printing license that Mario is. But it can be a genuinely popular license with quality products. Kill 3D Sonic. Fifteen years later, that blue furry fuck just isn't worth the green you spend on him. Go retro or go away!
Unless you're comfortable with redefining the entire franchise. But that's a discussion for another time.
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